The Strategic Advantage of Self-Care for Leaders
Image by @kaylottoon Unsplash
Self-Care Is Not a Soft Skill: Why It’s a Strategic Advantage for Today’s Leaders
“Self-care” still conjures up images of bubble baths, meditation apps, or taking a personal day after your inbox hits a certain threshold. (In posting this here and searching for a corresponding image, 90% of image search results were of a bathtub, a cup of tea or signs that said something like “breathe”). But speak with a group of senior leaders—and I mean really speak with them—and a different picture emerges. One of depletion masked by high performance. Of burnout buried beneath obligation. Of belief systems that quietly whisper: other people’s needs matter more than mine.
That’s the real story behind the Self Care for Leaders Training I created. Not another wellness initiative. Not another toolkit (although I do offer plenty of those). But a mindset shift for leaders who want to lead with clarity, courage, and sustainability.
Self-Care Has a Branding Issue
Let’s start with the misunderstanding. Self-care isn’t a checklist. It’s not a reward for getting through your to-do list or surviving another quarter. It’s not something you earn once everyone else’s needs are met.
Most of us don’t consciously reject self-care, we just quietly and consistently downgrade it.
We think:
“If I’m not doing it perfectly, it doesn’t count.”
“If others need support, my needs can wait.”
“If I stop, things will fall apart.”
But underneath that? A belief that often surfaces in my work with high-achieving, values-driven leaders:
“I am not worthy of my own care.”
And it’s not just anecdotal. A recent Deloitte study found that 60% of executives report they are “seriously considering quitting” for mental health reasons, despite often having access to well-being resources【Deloitte, 2023】. Something deeper is getting in the way.
Why I Created the Self Care for Leaders Coaching/Training
We are living in unprecedented times. The demands on leaders—especially women and underrepresented professionals—have never been higher. The shift to hybrid work, the “always on” culture, and the silent expectation to do more with less are draining even the most capable leaders.
Burnout rates among managers are climbing: Gallup’s 2022 Workplace Report showed that managers have among the highest burnout rates of any level in an organization at nearly 43%【Gallup, 2022】. And the World Health Organization has now classified burnout as an occupational phenomenon linked directly to chronic workplace stress. One could also argue that burnout can be extended to the home, especially during the early years of parenting where there are greater demands and dwindling resources and parental support.
Yes, organizations are offering wellness perks like gym memberships, mindfulness apps, flexible schedules. And these are great, but they are treating the symptom and not the root cause.
The real leverage point? The leader’s own beliefs about their worth, needs, and capacity. Self-care has to start from the inside out. You can’t practice it sustainably if you don’t believe you deserve it.
“Without the awareness of your own values, you’ll always default to performance, people-pleasing, or productivity. Even your “self-care” will start to look like another checklist. ”
Redefining Self-Care: From Task to Identity
In this training, I define self-care as:
“The embodied practice of honoring your personal values through actions that restore and protect your energy.”
It’s not something you do when you have time. It’s something you are when you lead with alignment. I’ve discovered that you can’t lead from that place unless you first know what actually matters to you. One of the biggest shifts leaders make in this training is learning to step off the autopilot of task mastery and into conscious self-leadership. And to do that, we have to start with understanding our core needs and values.
Without that awareness, you’ll always default to performance, people-pleasing, or productivity. Even your “self-care” will start to look like another checklist. You’ll try to rest or disconnect, but feel restless or guilty. Not because you’re doing it wrong, but because it’s not rooted in what truly replenishes you.
This is why one of the first parts of the training is helping leaders:
Identify their core values—not the aspirational ones, but the actual ones
Clarify what they need to feel grounded, well, and whole
Notice the gap between what they value and how they’re spending their time and energy
This self-knowledge becomes the foundation for sustainable change. And to support this shift, I introduce three core concepts:
The Flexibility Paradox
The more rigid and idealized our approach to self-care becomes, the more likely we are to abandon it when life doesn’t go as planned.
Decision Agency
The ability to consciously define what self-care looks like in your current context—without guilt, external validation, or rules.
Fluidity Principles
Personal, values-based statements that guide how you make intentional, adaptive choices about your wellbeing, especially when things shift.
These frameworks challenge perfectionism and people-pleasing. The two patterns that research shows are especially prevalent in high-achieving women and marginalized leaders【Harvard Business Review, 2022】.
From Burnout to Boundaries: One Client’s Shift
Boundaries are not just a leadership competency—they are a self-care practice. They are how we protect what we value.
Without boundaries, even the best self-care plans fail. Why? Because there’s no containment—no structure to safeguard your time, energy, or focus. Boundaries help us decide what gets in and what stays out—of our calendars, inboxes, conversations, and mental load.
This is why boundaries are a core part of the Self Care for Leaders training. Not in the abstract, but in real, practical, and deeply personal terms.
Recently, I worked with a senior leader who was constantly exhausted but couldn’t quite identify why. Together, we created a simple practice: she tracked every time she said “yes” to something that was misaligned—whether it wasn’t strategic, didn’t meet a personal need, or just wasn’t hers to carry.
After a few weeks, she looked at the data and said:
“No wonder I’m angry all the time. I’m not even on my own list.”
We developed a transitional script—“I’m not sure. Let me get back to you.”—to give her breathing room to assess requests. That one shift gave her the power to pause, reflect, and choose. And with it, she started rewriting her role—not just as a leader, but as someone worthy of protection.
Boundary Setting ≠ Time Management
One of the first things I challenge in this training is the myth of time management.
Let’s be clear: time is not something we can manage. It moves forward—relentlessly, impersonally, and without negotiation. No one can start it, stop it, or stretch it. What we can manage is how we engage with it: our decisions, energy, attention, and capacity.
Productivity hacks and clever scheduling apps have their place, but they are surface-level strategies. Without a shift in mindset and belief, even the most advanced time-blocking system will eventually collapse under the weight of internal conflict.
If you believe your worth comes from always being available…
If you assume saying yes is how you stay relevant…
If you fear that boundaries will make you seem selfish or uncommitted…
…then no tool will save you from burnout.
That’s why this work begins by reframing boundaries as acts of clarity and self-respect and not as rigid structures or schedule hacks. When you know what matters, you can choose what to protect. That’s not time management. That’s leadership.
The Strategic Case for Self-Care
So what’s the real ROI of self-care?
Before we dive into the data, let’s reframe the question. The most powerful shift leaders can make is understanding the distinction between:
Mindset, beliefs, and being-ness, and
Skills, tools, and tactics
You can have the best planner, productivity system, or access to every company-sponsored wellness benefit, and still burn out. Why? Because tools without mindset are temporary fixes.
Self-care as a strategic advantage means cultivating a mindset of worthiness, clarity, and sustainable decision-making. It means leaders who operate not just from urgency, but from alignment.
And yes, the research backs it up:
Teams with emotionally well leaders show higher engagement, creativity, and resilience. McKinsey’s 2023 report on Human Sustainability found that companies with high “relational health” (including psychological safety and leader modeling of well-being) outperform their peers in innovation and retention【McKinsey, 2023】.
The Microsoft Work Trends Index noted that employees whose managers model healthy boundaries are 23% less likely to report burnout【Microsoft, 2022】.
Gallup’s longitudinal studies confirm: wellbeing and performance are tightly linked. Teams led by leaders who prioritize their own wellbeing are more productive, more loyal, and more effective over time【Gallup, 2023】.
This is systems leadership where leaders set the tone, not self-indulgence. When leaders model sustainability, teams follow.
Bonus: Check-Out a simple ROI formula for Self-Care post on LinkedIn
For the Skeptical Leader
If the idea of self-care still feels like something soft, indulgent, or optional, I’ll offer you this:
If you don’t believe you’re worthy of your own care, no one else will either. Not your team. Not your clients. Not your family. Leadership isn’t about how much you can give. It’s about how clearly you can lead. And you cannot lead clearly when you are depleted.
One Question to Ask Yourself Today
What limiting belief am I holding about self-care?
Is it true?
Is it serving me?
What might be possible if I let it go?
Ready to Redefine What Self-Care Looks Like for You?
If you're curious about bringing this work to your leadership team or want to learn more about the Self Care for Leaders Training, I’d love to connect. Because when leaders thrive, everything changes.
Sources Cited:
Deloitte. (2023). Well-being and Mental Health at Work
Gallup. (2022, 2023). State of the Global Workplace
McKinsey Health Institute. (2023). The Human Sustainability Report
Microsoft Work Trend Index. (2022). Great Expectations: Making Hybrid Work Work
Harvard Business Review. (2022). Women at Work: Breaking the Burnout Cycle
APA. (2021). Stress in America Report
Let’s Talk Leadership Development
As a leadership development coach, I believe that strong teams are built from the inside out—through curiosity, shared purpose, and everyday moments of connection. If you're looking for fresh ways to strengthen your team or want support designing team experiences that feel real (not forced), I’d love to help. You can learn more about my approach to coaching and teaming at wholesum.me, or reach out directly to start a conversation. Let’s connect.

